I agree although 6th, 7th and 8th was Junior High for me but during those years we were all experiencing the same things. Our bodies changing from child bodies to adults and no book or video could really prepare us. I was in 6th grade when I had noticed my first pubic hair, then my penis started growing and somewhere around the end of 7th grade I spurted for the first time. I can't imagine my friends were all that different even if they were early or late bloomers. I wondered a lot about if I was normal. I jacked off and would feel guilty sometimes but low and behold I'd come back to it. I checked out other guys my age all the time mainly to see if I was measuring up so to speak.
In 8th grade and Freshman year of High School I had a few friends who jacked off with me here and there and it was reassuring to see that at least one other person in the world did the same things. My only regret was not just letting go and enjoying myself when we did things to pleasure each other. I used to hold back, and pretend I was weirded out or disgusted instead of just enjoying those moments. I thought back then to simply enjoy certain activities with another boy would make me gay and of course being 13 years old that's the worst thing. I didn't want to be one of those weird kids who liked boys and yet some of my most memorable and exciting sexual encounters were with other boys my age.
As I said, I wish that I would have just enjoyed my sexual explorations with no inhibitions, but I still had them so I am glad about that. Every boy no matter the race, religion, social class, intelligence, no matter what youth sub-culture they align themselves with, no matter any difference you can think of has the same changes and thoughts in common. I guarantee there is not one boy who around the middle school years doesn't at least think about what is happening to their bodies or experiment either alone or with someone else.
I took care of an autistic boy who could not communicate and even he would take his dick out and jerk off. I'd to give him his privacy. It's so universal that even now at my age I can counsel my nephew in these changes that he is experiencing. Yes, so this resonates so much you don't even know.
Thanks
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Starting when we were just babies, there were two other boys in our block that were the same age as me. We were together all the time not... -
Dave brings us this story from his youth. I believe it is best to let the story serve as testament to his affection for someone he cherished...
You mentioned that the autisic boy was non-verbal. A professional question: did he communicate in some other way that let you know he intended to masturbate?
ReplyDeleteThis author wrote so well about so many thoughts, inhibitions, and guilt that I think so many of us went through at that same time of life, just like he did. I remember my almost disgust in myself over what I was doing to mhy body and the thoughts and pleasures that were going through my mind. And I felt sure that no other boy was likely to be doing what I did (and so often)or having the thoughts abut other boys that I was having. Thanks to the author for describing this so well for all of us.
ReplyDeleteI want to continue my story with something that I just glossed over in this post. The details about the young man with autism that I used to take care of. I don't like to say he was non-verbal because he did talk, he talked occasionally in a quiet voice but he mostly repeated things you said to him or sometimes he might repeat something he heard on television. He could not really communicate as in have a conversation. He had a device that he could press certain buttons to ask for things like food, water, restroom, a toy yet he wouldn't say I want this, I want that. And even the device wasn't 100 per cent, for instance he might ask for food and then not eat anything.
ReplyDeleteI cared for him from age 11 to 15, became very close to his family and still keep in contact until this day. As to what signal he'd use, well there was nothing on his device that said MASTURBATE so that was out. He could have I supposed used the restroom button as a signal but he honestly didn't like being changed (he wore a pull up type thing) so he only pressed that if he pooped himself. No, one of his signals would be laughing, yes laughing. He laugh hysterically like he had just heard the funniest joke in the world and start tugging at his pants and if you came close he'd stop and say "cochino" and wag his finger and dart away. He was clearly repeating what someone had said to him. If you kept coming towards him his laughter would turn into what I called his frustration yell it sounded like "eeeeeee" and that could dissolve into crying. If he started crying then I'd watch out, biting, kicking, hitting he did it all.
He was 12 or so when this behavior came up. I had been forewarned by his parents that he was starting to touch himself but I didn't know what the behavior really looked like. He'd touch himself when I changed him but only until I was done cleaning him and he had on new clothes. He started doing this laughing that turned into bellowing as I continued coming towards him and trying to redirect him and I got bit really hard one time after he went into a crying fit. The next time I decided to see what he wanted by backing off. He got his pants undone, I mean he actually ripped the button out that first time and took that pull up down, I would have thought he wanted to be changed but it was right after I had just changed him. His penis was ERECT and I had seen his erections numerous times while changing him but he took down his clothes on his own and was erect. He started playing with it and I just left the room. I stayed close but I left the room. I came back in 15 minutes later and he was now standing with a limp dick and his pants and pull ups down. I helped him get dressed again.
It became a pretty routine thing, I'd leave him alone come in 10 maybe 15 minutes later and helped him get dressed again. I do not know what his parents would have thought of my letting him masturbate but it was better than getting my ass kicked by a boy with autism. There were times I could see the evidence of what he'd done and other times I could find no trace. I just figured that it was part of his being a boy and it was a need just as important as the things that he put on his communication device. I always secretly felt that he needed a button for that on that thing but never suggested it.